“I don’t see how an article of clothing can be indecent. A person, yes” ~Robert
The other day I posted on Facebook, “I have this love/hate relationship with spanx, and honestly right now I don’t know if I’m loving or hating.” And one of my friends responded….”sounds like good material for a blog.” So here it is…..
Okay, first a little history…what are spanx. When I speak of spanx, I am talking about the body shapers…the uber tight undergarments we wear under our clothes to give us a smooth, blemish free, muffin top free look. And for better or for worse, it appears that spanx have become a necessary part of our daily lives. Okay, I’ll back track here…a necessary part of our daily lives for those of us that desire a smooth, blemish free, muffin top free look… For me, rather than shoving my expanding assets into a tight fighting body shaper on a daily basis, I normally will cover up with loose-fitting tunics and leggings. But…on those days when more than loose tunics and leggings are required, I will squirm my way into one of these tight-fitting garments and bitch about it the rest of the day. Now, as much as I hate to wear spanx…I don’t think I could live without them. They do help me mask that extra 5 or 10 pounds…however, once I get over 10 pounds, I can pretty much forget the masking and try for a little damage control.
So now lets discuss this love/hate relationship. My love…the ability to still manage to fit into some of my favorite clothes, and look “okay” in them. And quite honestly, spanx are an effective body shaper that actually looks pretty. My hate…I just basically hate them…they are unyielding, they are controlling, and incredibly restrictive…kinda like some of the men I have dated. But…they do make me look good…not necessarily like some of the men I have dated. And again, backtracking, …let’s not really say “good,” maybe just better. But should I bitch…is it fair of me to bitch? I remember walking into my grandmother’s room while she would be struggling to get her girdle on. Now my grandmother was a sweet woman, but I never really saw her exercise or workout…except when she was trying to get her girdle on…then I would see her bend, and jump, and do whatever was necessary to get her girdle on, and get it on right. And then after she got the girdle on, then she had to attach the stockings. Which brings me to another topic…panty hose. Who wears panty hose anymore? I love the cute little patterned hose and tights…but if we’re just talking about just regular, everyday panty hose, especially tummy control…well you can forget about that…Okay, I’m struggling here…I would rather _______________than ever wear another pair of panty hose….stick toothpicks in my eyes, stick tooth picks under my finger nails, wear 1970′s polyester…well you get the point…I haven’t worn panty hose in years, and I’m not planning to any time in the near future…in the far future either.